A Continuation of Rambles

I cannot believe how much time has passed between blog posts. Kinda sad, right? Things are a little hectic with a toddler, so I don’t take much time for personal matters. My blog posts have gotten rather sparse.

Let me see if I can recap the past 6-12 months' occurrences a bit...

I actually considered the whole stay-at-home mom thing, but realized that it wasn’t for me. When my son was three months old, I returned to work in academia in the field of program coordination. Dr. S gave me the opportunity to work from home and go to campus occasionally for meetings and events. It was exhausting, but wonderful. Whenever my son become mobile, it was no longer a realistic option. At that point (which was about six months ago), I came to a crossroads with work and personal life. While I enjoyed being at home with M, I also enjoyed the adult interactions at work. I made the decision to go to the office three days a week and arranged for in-home care for M.

The set-up worked well for a while until M’s in-home care provider changed. He was no longer getting the interaction, socialization, etc. that he needed. It became difficult for me to not worry about him while at work, so I chose to put M in daycare. It is week three of daycare and, aside from the bugs he’s had, he has adjusted rather well. My son is a social toddler, so he enjoys the interactions and structured activities of daycare.

For those of you who follow me on Facebook, you've probably caught a glimpse at our daily occurrences. Sorry I temporarily lost touch in the blogosphere.

Sick Day

Well, we finally took the plunge and enrolled M in daycare. He started last week and has already caught a fee daycare bugs: diarrhea, pink eye, congestion, and the neverending runny nose. Perhaps since he is only going three days per week, he can spend the other four days at home recooperating! ;D I am hoping the daycare illnesses are mild and of short duration.

Nonetheless, aside from not feeling well, M is in good spirits. He loves daycare and has already made a few friends. He comes home happy and tired. D feels like he is contributing more; he picked up M on his first day of daycare and dropped him off the next two. I can go to the office and know that my son is socializing, learning, well cared for, and content. His needs are being met and he is happy. Such a well-adjusted kid!

M sleeping on Mommy

Mad Skills

Here is a moderately brief look at 4.5 minutes of M's mad skills.
He is ~10.5 months old here (45 weeks old yesterday) and almost walking.

YouTube

It is a little hard to believe that the ole one year birthday is just around the corner. Any suggestions on the size and peeps to include? I'd like to keep the party relatively simple and the guest list moderate (close friends and family). I considered doing a Halloween theme where all the kids wear a costume, but may delay this idea until next year. Please let me know your thoughts.

Wiccey and the Peacock Feather

I love the sound of M's laugh!

YouTube

Hope this brightens your day! Have a great weekend.

Divine Intervention Anyone?

Thanks so much for providing me with advice I requested on my personal/professional life choice. I especially found the advice from Meredith (AKA MoJo), Missy, and Janice extra encouraging. Although everyone had a different take on my strengths, it was all from personal experiences--the best kind of advice. The advice allowed me to do a little soul searching to discover what was best for my family.

As much as I love being home with M, I really enjoy the sense of accomplishment I receive from working. In addition, I enjoy contributing to the household income. As I am still breastfeeding, I could not imagine doing it while working full time. My current career has allowed me to continue to work and nurse my son, which is a rare attribute to find these days with careers.

In addition to asking friends for advice, I did a lot of praying on the matter. I often pray and go to my wise friends and fam for words of encouragement, both of which have led me down the right path in the past. I am usually relatively private about my spirituality, but this time I want to share my recent encounter. I truly believe some divine intervention was responsible in this decision. I had a chance encounter in my neighborhood early one Friday evening (July 31) with a woman who offered her childcare services to me after seeing M. We spoke briefly about life and I mentioned that I was looking for in-home part-time care for my then ~9.5 month son. I obtained her contact info and discussed checking her references. I had been down and out after spending the week at home working and caring for a sick baby who was still adjusting to EDT from our recent trip to Australia, all without any childcare assistance. On top of my frustrations, I got a heads up from work that my boss was at getting frustrated with my lack of dedication and in-office time and was not looking forward to the confrontation the following week at work. Little did I know at the time, Marquita had just lost her job on the day we met and was devastated by the recent turn of events. Our meeting could not have come at a better time for us.

We spoke over the phone a few days later. After speaking to two of her references, I felt that I had learned what I needed about her character and was ready for an interview. It all seemed too good to be true and I was a little wary. I spoke of this to one reference and she politely asked me if I was religious. I mentioned that I was Catholic and she stated that Marquita was also. Not only was she a very spiritual person, she also taught religion classes at the local church. I was already thinking divine intervention might have come into play and was then convinced.

Marquita came over one morning to discuss the job. She arrived and interacted with M for a while. While M was napping, we spoke openly and I felt very comfortable with her. She ended up staying for about four hours that morning--definitely enough time to get a feel for her character, interpersonal skills, and competencies as a childcare provider. In addition to caring for her 13 siblings, her own three children, and other infants and toddlers, she also had formal training in early childhood development. She loves children and is somewhat one herself (like me, right?). She is very encouraging and understands developmental stages. Most importantly, M really likes her.

She has been caring for M for over a week now. I can already tell such a difference in him. He has learned to clap, wave hello, find his nose (mostly), strengthen his cruising skills, eat more solids, and so much more. She is definitely a positive, encouraging person for M. She also does house work and cooks--bonus! I am ecstatic with Marquita and hope she is able to stick around for quite a while.

I'll Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

Hi fellow mommies (and mommies to be)! I have a big decision to make regarding work and would really appreciate some input. I have been a working mom from the home office since mid-January, only having to occasionally go into the office for meetings (~2-4 times/month). Working from home with an infant has been a challenge for me, but so worth it because I have been able to maintain our home and stay home with M to experience all of the newness that makes motherhood so wonderful!

Much has happened in the past month. Right before seven months, M was introduced to solids. He did well with cereals but hated baby foods, so I chose to make food for him. Having a lot of food allergies myself and with M having some pretty severe eczema (usually a precursor to allergies), I have cautiously and carefully introduced foods after six months of age and one at a time to give his digestive and immune systems time to adapt to solids. He has done well and only had allergic reactions to two foods: yogurt (he had serious hives around his mouth) and peaches (minor hives on the face). This just means we'll stay away from dairy products and peaches and reintroduce them later. Until then, I am eating both in hopes that exposure via breast milk will assist in developing a tolerance/desensitivity to both. So far, he loves rice cereal, oatmeal cereal, apples, pears, sweet potatoes, squash, carrots, zucchini, rice, avocado, and tolerates potatoes (a little too dry for his taste).

Right about the time I started solids, his first two bottom teeth began peeking through the gums. A few weeks later, his top two teeth made an appearance. If this keeps up, he'll have a mouth full in about five months! Now at eight months teeth number five and six are beginning to tear through his gum line. Thank goodness M is getting teeth in pairs thus far; twice the teeth and hopefully half the pain.

In addition to the teeth and foods, M is also crawling. He began by rolling and then progressed to the belly crawl. He has now graduated to crawling on all fours (although he still prefers the belly crawl) and is pulling himself up and taking assisted steps. He actually took his first step for my dad the day before Memorial Day--go Grandpa! Month seven (and so far month eight) has been busy, busy for little M.

Not only has M experienced so much, there have been a whirlwind of changes for our family. Without going into too many details, let's just say that D is working more and getting paid less than before (he already worked a lot of hours). Hey, at least he has a job, right? He travels quite a bit, so I am all M sees day in and day out (occasionally he gets sick of looking at my mug so I get him out of the house to play with other kids). Without having consistent help (or even knowing when D will come home), my working days turn into nights and don't seem to ever end. Several weeks ago, I asked a neighborhood girl to help watch M. V comes over twice a week for about 1-1.5 hours and plays with him. She is new to babysitting, but seems to be taking to it very naturally. M also really likes her. It has already been established that he is a sucker for pretty girls. ;D

Having a baby who is crawling and into everything makes it next to impossible to get much accomplished around the house and with work. My work hours have started to slowly diminish and my productivity is not par for the job. I am now forced to choose between going into the office twice a week (~5-6 hours/day) or quit working and stay at home with M. Being a double-edged sword, I now need to decide if our family can afford (and find) part-time daycare or if we can afford living soley on D's income. In an ideal world I would love to stay home with M and enjoy every minute of it, but I would feel guilty that I could not contribute to the family income (the main reason I chose to return to work in the first place). In the real world, we cannot afford to diminish our income even more; another hit this year will not help us pay bills.

Another option that D and I are tossing around is providing childcare for one or two to supplement our income. My thoughts are to offer part-time care and D thinks it would be helpful to offer pick-up service in the morning (and possibly drop-off service in the evening). We think charging hourly rather than for the entire day will give parents a little more flexibility. We aren't sure how feasible and practical this option is, but it is definitely something to consider.

What I would very much appreciate is some input. Feel free to e-mail or reply to this blog entry, or to call if you have my number. In addition to commenting on the information I provided here, please provide me with the following information on your daycare experience(s) so that we can make the best decision for M and for our family: daycare name, type of daycare (in home, at a facility, at provider's home), part-time or full-time care, cost, type of fee (flat rate or hourly rate), and anything else that you may find helpful. If nothing more, some encouragement and similar experiences will be most helpful. Thanks so much!

Thanks for Listening

I wanted to take the time to thank all family and friends for listening. That's it, just for listening. When I went off Zoloft during pregnancy, a lot of my anxiety and depression returned. It was a very difficult time for me.

I know that I made a lot of phone calls searching for an ear to listen, and it may have inconvenienced some of you, but it made all the difference. Feeling extra needy during that time forced me to back off from everyone for a bit and take some time to reflect. Sorry if some of you only hear from me when I am in crisis mode, but I feel that I take up so much of your time that I need to give you some space.

Going off Zoloft during pregnancy was a difficult task for me. I remember the before, the during, and the after Zoloft. I experienced the withdrawal--which was a bear and very rough. I never forgot the before, nor did I ever want to experience it again. It was a rough road to go down again, but wonderful friends and family made it all so bearable.

If you heard from me a lot (or even a little) during pregnancy, thank you so much for being there for me. I really needed an ear, advice, and encouragement. If you haven't heard much from me since--in addition to having a baby--I felt the need to back off for I had already imposed so much. Please just know that you are a blessing to have as a friend, very appreciated, and that I would love to return the favor or do whatever I can in the future should you ever need it.